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One of the first decisions that couples make after they decide to end their marriage is choosing divorce mediation vs. litigation in Oklahoma City. While both processes can result in a divorce that is legally recognized by the state of Oklahoma, they differ in fundamental ways. Learning more about each option can help you decide which one is right for your family and your financial situation.
How Divorce Mediation Works
Divorce mediation is a negotiation process in which an impartial third party, known as the mediator, helps people talk about issues and identify possible solutions. The mediator does not impose a decision on the parties but helps them to reach an agreement when possible.
When both parties sign the written agreement, it is submitted to the court for approval. A typical divorce mediation case may include issues such as:
Many people find that mediation is more flexible than litigation. In mediation, the parties develop their own settlements rather than asking the judge to decide the issues for them.
How Divorce Litigation Differs
Divorce litigation follows a traditional legal process. After a petition is filed with the court, each spouse presents evidence and legal arguments for a judge to consider. When both parties cannot reach an agreement, the judge must decide the outcome of disputed issues.
Litigation is the only option in certain circumstances, such as when:
- A spouse is refusing to provide financial information.
- Allegations of domestic violence or coercion have been made.
- The parties strongly disagree about custody, support, or significant financial matters.
- One spouse suspects the other of hiding or transferring marital property.
Litigation is not a fast process. In litigation, the court sets deadlines, and each spouse must follow procedural rules. The litigation process, which may include hearings, discovery, and motions, usually takes longer, especially when the divorce includes complex financial matters.
In Oklahoma County, 3,002 divorce decrees and 5,540 marriage licenses were issued in 2025. As a result, the divorce rate was 3.7 per 1,000.
In most cases, contested divorce litigation cases take place at the Oklahoma County Courthouse, 320 Robert S. Kerr Avenue, Oklahoma City, OK 73102. A lawyer needs to be knowledgeable about divorce litigation laws if a divorce proceeds to court.
Factors to Consider Before Choosing
When choosing between mediation and litigation, people can benefit from carefully considering the factors that may affect their divorce. Some beneficial questions to ask include:
- Can both spouses communicate with one another respectfully?
- Are both parties willing to provide a complete financial disclosure?
- Are there safety or coercion concerns?
- Does the marital estate include any complex assets, such as a family business?
- Do both parties want to negotiate the terms of the divorce or ask a judge to decide?
Answering these questions can help people in Oklahoma City and elsewhere better understand which process is likely to have the greatest outcome for them.
Options for High-Asset Divorces
People who own or have interests in certain businesses, such as family trusts, stocks, and medical practices, may prefer mediation. This gives the parties more time to go over financial records with accountants and business valuation professionals.
Therefore, rather than immediately seeking a judge’s decision on each matter, both individuals have the opportunity to meticulously review all proposals and negotiate while considering future financial impacts of their decisions.
Litigation may become necessary if one or both parties have incomplete or inaccurate financial records. According to the Small Business Administration, Oklahoma had 362,364 small businesses as of 2021.
Hire a Divorce Mediation Lawyer
It’s a common misconception that having an attorney is counterproductive to mediation. If you hire a divorce mediation lawyer, you can obtain legal advice before, during, and after mediation and still participate in a collaborative process.
An Oklahoma City divorce mediation attorney can help recognize legal issues that otherwise may not come up in negotiation. A lawyer can explain the long-term effects of proposed settlement terms and help make sure an agreement is comprehensive enough to prevent later disputes.
Ultimately, legal counsel allows you to approach negotiations fully aware of your rights, rather than being solely reliant on the mediator to facilitate your situation.
FAQs
Can I Switch From Mediation to Litigation if Negotiations Are Not Successful?
Yes, you can switch from mediation to litigation if negotiations are not successful. If the mediation process does not lead to a full settlement of the divorce, either spouse may continue the divorce as a litigation case.
Any disputed issues may be presented to the court for a judge to make a decision on. Often, even a partial agreement achieved in mediation helps to clarify the remaining points of contention, unlike cases where parties begin litigation without prior negotiation.
Can Mediation Be Used to Modify an Existing Court Order?
Mediation can be used to modify an existing court order. Former spouses may attempt mediation to work out changes involving parenting time, child custody, or other issues after the divorce is over. If an agreement is reached, it may need to be submitted to the court for approval before it is legally binding, depending on the type of modification and the relevant Oklahoma law.
Is Mediation Available if the Spouses Live in Different States?
Yes, mediation is available even if the spouses live in different states. Mediators in many locations offer virtual sessions to allow both spouses to attend without being in the same room or even state. Interstate divorces can have some unique legal considerations, but mediation may be a convenient way to negotiate settlement terms while minimizing the number of in-person meetings.
What Happens if One Spouse Changes Their Mind After Mediation?
If one spouse changes their mind after mediation, the outcome depends on whether or not an agreement was signed. If a final settlement agreement has not yet been signed, either spouse may continue to negotiate or simply not agree to the proposed terms. If an agreement has been signed and approved by the court, however, certain provisions, such as property division, may be very difficult to modify except under certain legal circumstances.
Why Hire Bundy?
The right legal advice can have a significant impact on the course of your divorce. Aaron Bundy is the only Fellow of the International Academy of Family Lawyers (IAFL) in Oklahoma.
Other Oklahoma City family law attorneys at the firm are Fellows of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers (AAML) and nationally recognized family law professionals.* If you are considering mediation or litigation, contact Bundy to talk about your situation and find out which option is right for you.
*Awards and recognition are not guarantees of future results. Selection criteria vary by organization.